9 August 2009

Ofally difficult / meaty matter / insert your own pun here

I've been on something of a green revolution recently.
It started last year when we were in the US where I picked a book called Green Chic. On reading it, I found myself frequently thinking the author was wussing out. Not willing to take even *slightly* cooler showers, let the toilet mellow even once between flushes or give up chilling her glass of wine to perfection? Okay, so I can understand why not all women like the idea of using reusable sanitary supplies, but to dismiss it out of hand with a simple "ick", without exploring any of the options seemed a little silly to me - or is that a marker of my own attitudes these days?
What really got me thinking was the really quite inspiring Green as a Thistle blog run by a Toronto-based arts and entertainment reporter, who has now published the book to the right about the experience. What seemed like a very simple premise - one small change every day for a year - actually ends up being quite a challenge, as the poor girl had to remember all of them day to day, and come up with them all in the first place - and as she found out during the year, even the really good companies have their drawbacks (Neal's Yard and Method, both of whom are lovely and pretty clear about their objectives and values, insist on continuing to use SLS despite the concerns raised by its use), which makes being really green without moving to a small house in the woods extremely difficult. No wonder so many environmentalists lack a sense of humour; they're too exhausted.
Anyhoo, both Vanessa and the good people at Riverford extol the virtues of eating locally - and therefore seasonally - produced food. I try. Seasonal generally means fruit and veg, which for us is mostly taken care of through Riverford's weekly deliveries. But until today, when I was checking off a piece on the 'food revolution' Labour wants to start in Britain, I hand't realised how wrong it seems to me to focus on just this. There's the massive issue of food wastage, of which we're all a little bit guilty, there's the method of production and there's the fact that most of us are omnivores.
I am not giving up sausage sandwiches any time soon - although it's been ages since I've had a bacon butty, so perhaps I've uninentionally given up those - but I am trying to figure out how I can eat less meat without foregoing the protein fix I need at lunchtime if I'm not to keel over within an hour of eating. Don't tell me to try a stirfry for work lunches - you try making them at 5am or stomaching one that's gone soggy and brown after being made the night before an early shift.
This is when I really do think growing up with supermarkets has done us an immense amount of damage. In one of Jamie Oliver's books is a chart showing every commonly eaten animal and the cuts of meat you can get from them, the sort of image I remember being fascinated by when it was in poster form on the wall of the local cash-and-carry when I was about four, and that you still see on the odd butcher's wall.
But generally, you don't see them on butchers' walls because you don't see butchers. I don't know where our local one is, and I'm a little nervous about finding them and asking for all those other, economical, obscure cuts of meat - and whether you can buy ear and cheek and all the other bits that usually go to waste anywhere than a specialist outlet.
It's much easier to shower in the semi-dark, wear the same pair of jeans till they're about ready to walk off on their own and get wise on the sorts of plastic I can recycle via the council or Tesco.

14 July 2009

Nature's mysteries, part 1

Remember the whale that swam up the Thames?
Perhaps she was just looking for a good cuppa:
Pearls Before Swine

30 June 2009

I should have no problem then

I'm used to sweating, being gifted with a body that seems to panic about possibly getting warm at any point above freezing and medication which increases a person's propensity to get all damp.
I'm used to wearing layers and loose clothing (but not too loose - you don't want trousers floating stylishly wide on your legs if your thighs are sticking together inside them) and drinking a lot.
Which, in this weather, as my employer is keen to tell everyone (see 12th par from bottom), is just what we should be doing.
Good.
Shame they didn't mention how vital Soleros and large jugs of elderflower cordial with mint are, or I'd have the full slate of healthy summer whims.

10 June 2009

So what do you do with a kohlrabi?

8 June 2009

Bad Pete

Mentioned in a text a copuple of plan-ettes I had for my days off this week. He sent me a link to The Londonist proclaiming Bea's of Bloomsbury to be the next best thing since Victoria slices.
I feel a tea party in the British Museum's Great Hall coming on.

I can't help thinking, having listened to one disgruntled MP talking about how Parliamentary Labour Party meetings have worked (or not, depending on your perspective) recently is that they're very much like the old image of the Women's Institute meeting. They all file in, and listen to some nice lady talking about cheese-making or similar.
Tonight's must be like having the original Calendar Girls in.

Normal service is resumed

Much as I generally dislike animal stories, the fact is they do very well for us at work.
Before I launch my crusade to process only that material feautring animals with a minimum set level of skill - say the canine equivalent of Tony Hawks, or a cat who is at least Grade 4 (like me) on their instrument of choice - I bring you the skateboarding bulldog.
Where's Harry Hill when you need him?

6 June 2009

Woman trouble

There are times - not many - when I thoroughly dislike being a girl.
For two of roughly every 33 days all I want to do is curl up on the sofa, drinking tea and hot chocolate while I suffer from constant gods-awful wind and a similar never-ending urge to go to the loo. Nothing has been invented that can deal with the sheer volume those first two days, nor that can make the way parts of my body distort less painful when trying to deal with their efforts.
(Do any other women find their insides warping and expanding and being downright painful to the touch for a week or so around their periods?)
I have beautiful soft fleecy washable liners, which you can layer up to get the level of protection you need, which helps the indestructible internal protection cope - on their own, either would be overwhelmed in less than an hour.
But the promise of being able to forget about the whole thing and go rollerblading down a beachfront?
It's true the damned things are shorter than they once were, but the bit that's decreased in length is the far more comfortable end of the process, leaving me to continue to suffer feeling grumpy, gassy and cursing my second X chromosome.

26 May 2009

Two things

Firstly, do not remember ever seeing so much *green* in the landscape before. I probably have, but I don't remember driving through countryside that was practically neon before. I know most occasions I'm on the home stretch of the M6 it's dark, but I don't remember ever having seen the heart-shaped forest (insert your own version of the WWII-based origins story here) near Tebay actually looking so heart-shaped. It's all most verdant.
Secondly, I am the newest member of the club of people whose cars pass their MOTs first time. I have never, ever had a car which gets through its MOT without serious work needed on some part of it before. Prior to this year, much as I love my motors, it has always been a case of be loved by Sam, be steadily worn to little bits by Sam. Ask Gromit and Flopsy. But this year I dropped Barney at Howat's pretty much convinced she was going to fail - ominous rattlings from one of the exhaust shields again, the funny sound I think is actually paranoia made mechanical where I thought a wheel bearing was going, her ability to drink oil like Pete does ginger beer (not much, but in almost binge-like style when they do). And yet I had three advisories which Dad made a 'meh' sound at - meaning, 'I can do those for you at some point...', had one pinch bolt (?) replaced, and passed! I must get her balloons to celebrate.
Actually, three things.
Homemade Mississippi Mud Pie. Leave it a few days after baking. The filling goes from being set and creamy but very sweet, a bit like cheesecake, to dense, fudgy and ridiculously rich and satisfying. Were it not a heart attack in a pie dish I'd eat it constantly.

16 May 2009

Tie Breaker

Oh come on!
When I was at senior school, we were told to tuck our ties into our shirts once we were in the technology block (RIP), or keep our jumpers on, which would keep them well out of the way of a sanding machine or hob - and we had aprons too!
I refuse to believe that's why the tie is being phased out of schools. As for the other health and safety situations in which a tie could be dangerous: the point of most H&S assessments is to point out the risks and how to make sure they don't become threats, rather than to say "oooh, that's dangerous, so you'd better not do it". As that's the result of most of the investigations we get to hear about in the Daily Mail and its wannabe local equivalents, I can only assume LEAs have heard that some children use their ties as implements of torture, for flicking other students, hanging them on the coatpegs (does any school have them, or cloakrooms, any more?) and attempted strangulations in the lower school bogs. Bullying is generally considered A Bad Thing, but I can't imagine the PTB thinking banning ties will solve the problem.
As for concerns about preventing kids from customising their uniforms... I remember Dad asking as he dropped me off one day if the girls from the school across the road were actually wearing skirts because he couldn't see much sign of one below the hems of their very baggy, chunky knit, cricketers' style jumpers. We were never told to take off our jewellery in cookery, because we weren't supposed to be wearing it to start with. Getting mixed raw ingredients out of the fine detail of a sovereign ring is hard work. My favourite school jumper was full of holes, including some I'd really worked at on the cuffs as a way of keeping my hands warm in the colder classrooms.
Kids will always find a way to make their uniform more personal.
So WTF?